Hiding Awayyy From Uranus

Ms Westwood



Oooyyyeee
It has been such a challenging week
Thus far
I'm trying to make tonight
Not so challenging
By hiding away
With faggots & fags & gin
Plus chocolate & grass & grease

So angry with Alex
Because I'm angry at myself
I wanted to ask him to stay
I wanted him to know to stay
And I wasn't brave enough
To ask him to stay
To ask anyone
Cause I don't know how to do that
I don't know how to say
Stay here
I need you
I'm learning
But I''m not sure how to say it
Without years of judgment piling in my head

Am I making myself clear?

I am so horny right now
But so unwilling to budge
Off my perfect one
And why should I budge?

So many cute guys in my life
But most gay
Another portion of boys in my life
Not yet to scratch
Or i'd be fucking them, rather than typing
These need a little self esteem boost
Or a self discipline boost
Or a self love boost
One and the same, really
But I'm not willing to really invest in any one boy at the moment
I'm working on my own boost
Then
There is that final percentage
The guys I see, here and there, who make my heart & head race
Or in the same group
The future lovers already in my life
I'm learning
I'm preparing
I'm almost there
Almost

But the thirst is growing stronger
And the lines between now and then
Are blurring
I walk down one of the busiest streets in the world
And my body walks
While my mind body is filled with come over and over
And I am haunted
And I am entranced
My physicality is crossing over
And I moan out loud sometimes
Sometimes I do
And I go unnoticed
These are the times that I am happy to go unnoticed
One of the few times

I am ready to be treated like a queen
As Chris has told me
I need to be treated
I agree and I'm ready
More than ready
Not sure how to expect
I guess
I better not expect it
Or anyone
Or anything
Just trust